English
EspañolMarriage is an extraordinary gift of God to the human couple. In the conjugal union between man and woman, the Triune God placed the image and likeness of his own communion of love.
Text
“Whatever the case, “all these situations require a constructive response seeking to transform them into opportunities that can lead to the full reality of marriage and family in conformity with the Gospel. These couples need to be welcomed and guided patiently and discreetly”. That is how Jesus treated the Samaritan woman (cf. Jn 4:1-26): he addressed her desire for true love, in order to free her from the darkness in her life and to bring her to the full joy of the Gospel.” (The Joy of Love, n.294)
Commentary
Many couples who are cohabitating or who have only celebrated a civil marriage know in fact that they are “halfway there” and, although they have been deferring it, they have the intention of reaching the sacrament.
Part of this itinerary is a correct evaluation of the current situation: why is it not enough? What have we done wrong? This last question, above all, often makes them uneasy. They know they would have to ask God for forgiveness, but they do not know precisely for what. They feel that it would not be fair to regret having decided to be together because they do love each other. Even less do they regret having brought their children into the world, even if outside the sacrament. What must I be regretful? Having had sex without being married? What else?
It gives them great peace of mind to know that they need not regret anything good they have done in their lives when they have been together. Their love, because it is love, is good. Moreover, their fatherhood and motherhood are also inherently good. For all love and parenthood ultimately come from God. Perhaps they have been exemplary partners and good parents up to this point. They have known how to love. Many things have been done well, and that should not be regretted.
I instead encourage them to think about what they have been able to do well with effort and the other many things they have received as a gift; these are God´s graces, received even now that they are not yet married. Imagine how much better it will be with God if it has gone this well so far. When the couple becomes a union of love, each one is for the other an extraordinary gift from God, an image and likeness of the manner in which the Triune God loves. Their children and many other moments in their family life are also a gift. Is it fair for them to receive all these gifts and then turn their backs on God? Should they not be grateful and eager to completely fulfill the design of love God placed in true marriage? Perhaps they are ignorant of the jewel they are holding in their hands. Or do they behave like a child who snatches a valuable gift, runs away from the giver, breaks it down, and then throws its pieces away?
