English
EspañolLove always sees possibilities, even when circumstances are adverse. It opens up the future and is not buried by the past. Such an attitude is not stupid naivety. It is the hope that nests in the fidelity of authentic love.
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“(Enduring) every trial with a positive attitude. It stands firm in hostile surroundings. This “endurance” involves not only the ability to tolerate certain aggravations, but something greater: a constant readiness to confront any challenge. It is a love that never gives up, even in the darkest hour.” (The Joy of Love, n.118)
Commentary
Every love relationship is tested precisely because it is love and demands to grow. Whoever wants to love must be willing to fight trials instead of thinking that they are symptoms of the agony of love. That mentality is childish. Maturity understands that love must grow strong, combatant, courageous and faithful. Moreover, that means to accept, without fear, the trials and to overcome them.
To see the setbacks only as something negative, recriminate oneself for not having acted in another way that could have avoided them, constantly thinking about the problem, stuck on the why… reveals an idea as idyllic as unreal of the truth of authentic love. This negative attitude only leads us to enlarge problems without facing them with courage and light and sinks us in setbacks; it keeps us in the past. It is not accepting what has happened instead of assuming it and considering it an opportunity.
What if we accept the setback? What if we understand that our love has to face trials in order to grow? And, what if we see them as occasions to grow? What if we conjugate the future instead of the past? What if we ask ourselves, “what can I learn from this setback” and “how can I help the other people involved to see it positively? What if we consider the battlefields with optimism and hope as scenes of victory?
It is not easy, but it is good. It is not stupid naiveté. It is the courage of brave and mature love.
