English
Español“I do!” This is a yes to us together, a yes to the future by your side, a yes to keeping our union alive, overcoming and magnifying what life brings us each day!
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“Another great challenge of marriage preparation is to help couples realize that marriage is not something that happens once for all (…) Their gaze now has to be directed to the future that, with the help of God’s grace, they are daily called to build. For this very reason, neither spouse can expect the other to be perfect (…)By saying “I do,” they embark on a journey that requires them to overcome all obstacles standing in the way of their reaching the goal.” (The Joy of Love, n.218)
Commentary
To marry is to establish an intimate union of life and love. It is the joint commitment to keep it alive, make it grow and restore daily mistakes. Marriage´s great treasure is its strength. There is strength in said union of love. Disunity, on the other hand, weakens and kills it. The long-term advantage of looking in the same direction is that it awakens the common conscience of the faithful and loyal commitment, based on the spouses´ intense and very much alive desire to create together the best joint project possible for them. All the while understanding that love is also an act of joint will, consensuses, not a weak, changing and, above all, individual and self-absorbed passing feeling
In this regard, I once heard a phrase that brought up the following: love is not a matter of two, but of three, you, him/her, and God. the sacrament is God’s complicity with its lights, strengths, and graces. I think that this consideration is indispensable for learning to live married life as something unfinished and therefore called to grow – far beyond the difficulties – and that, viewed in this light, places husband and wife in the position of creators, producers, and protagonists of their own story.
The person most appropriate to become our spouse is not the one who resembles us the most. The secret lies not in being identical. He who is capable – with his lucidity, dedication, and wise art – of harvesting union from any scenario that life brings is the most appropriate person to become our spouse. Uniting as one does not come by itself, like the sunrise or the rain, it stems from loving each other come what may, from embracing and corresponding to each other´s efforts, it flows from attempting to make love pleasant for one another, instead of disgusting or bitter.
Enjoying a mature love, with the faithful complicity of spouses focused on the maintenance of their union and communication, so it remains alive, opens the door to a tremendous inner richness, capable of a complete understanding of the other person´s actions and their being, which in turn allows them to rise and help one another.
As Mother Teresa said: “When I do not know what to do, I always ask Love. He is never wrong”.
