English
EspañolWhen we talk, we share what we have in our hearts. Is our heart filled only by ourselves? If that is so, then we will only talk about ourselves. Is our heart filled with others? In this case, we will speak about them.
Text
“Those who love not only refrain from speaking too much about themselves, but are focused on others; they do not need to be the centre of attention.” (The Joy of Love, n.97)
Commentary
Adela arrives at school to pick up her daughters. She always arrives a little before dismissal time and takes the opportunity to chat with other ladies. However, fewer and fewer women come to talk to her. “What is the matter? It has been days since anyone has gone to talk to Adela?” asks one lady. The others answer: “Uff. Who can stand her! Always talking about how well she is doing and how wonderful she is. She will not let you participate in the conversation. She is selfish.” It is true. If I am selfish, I am locked in my world, and no one else has a place in it. I will think only of myself and talk only about myself, what worries me, what pleases me, my achievements, my husband, children, and grandchildren, but I will talk about them as excellent “things of mine,” “things” that adore me. Others have no place in my world; I ignore them, I do not listen to them because, in my opinion, they have nothing important to tell me; what really matters is what I want to communicate: I want others to find out how important I am. What a difference it makes if I am open to others: they will be the ones to occupy my thoughts, and I will be interested in them. They will be the ones to talk share what is happening to them what they need. I will be the one to ask them: How are you? How did it go? Tell me about your children, your husband. To love is to prefer the other person, the beloved. He, who is constantly in his predilection, simply does not love anyone. He loves only himself.